how it should be....

Today I had to return again to Todd's infectious Disease doctor to pick up more IV medications after our visit yesterday.   I was kind of bummed driving in because first of all, it is a long drive and we were just there yesterday, and second, because I really want Todd well.  I am maintaining my focus that God is in control and I am so very thankful for the doctors and the attentiveness to his medical needs.  I have no doubt we are in good hands both directions.  But still yet, I wasn't excited about the drive, knowing it was all because we had to await more approval from insurance, to fill the prescription and have the meds drawn up.  They have to approve if the doctors order it, so it seems such a silly step.   But its how it works, and honestly, I would drive however far I needed to keep Todd healing.

I got there in just the nick of time, as I didn't want to have to leave work any earlier than usual.  I rushed in, grabbed the meds, signed the paper proving I picked it up, and was rushing back out the door and down the elevator.  It was then that my steps were slowed, my heart was touched, and the drive back was much sweeter than the rush up. 

As I stepped off the elevator, I saw this very elderly couple making their way towards the doors to go outside.  It is a rainy, cool fall day and they were bundled up as if it were winter.  They were moving very slowly and cautiously, and the woman was using a cane.  I noticed that much less than I noticed the fact that they were tenderly holding hands.  I found myself taking a peek into their lives and savoring the scene.  Though the electronic doors opened, he still held his hand across that door in a manner of respect, showing her his loyalty of respect and manners.  I could tell right then, she has probably never opened a door on her own if he was around!  After they stepped outside, they shuffled over to the nearest bench, where he gently assisted her to her seat.  I don't think if she would have lost her balance, he could have been much help, but his heart was there ready and willing to try no matter.  It was precious. 

As if that weren't sweet enough, before he walked off, he leaned over to kiss her forehead.  It was so tender and innocent.  The purest form of respect and love.  I was curious as to why he was kissing her goodbye, so I kept observing the scene as I slowly made my way out the door.  I was sure he must be going back inside and someone was picking her up.  It seemed like such a sweet goodbye.  As I walked by, I made sure to be in a way that I could continue to take it in as much as possible.  He turned from her and instead of heading inside, headed slowly out to the parking lot towards a light blue Buick.  By this time, I reached my car and loaded my daughter in the back and buckled her up.  I was confused as to why he had said goodbye, only to leave her outside alone.  A lot of thoughts were running through my head.  I decided she must have an appointment and he will return for her later.  Its all I could come up with.

Wasn't long, however, until I was blown away by what was really the case.  As he slowly backed his car out, he turned and made his way to the front of the building and pulled under the awning where she was sitting.  He made his way from the car and back to the obvious love of his life and began to assist her to her feet and on to the car.  It was then that my heart completely melted.  That sweet kiss wasn't a goodbye.  It was simply an act of love left to linger for the few moments they would be apart while he went to get the car for his bride.  Obviously, he would never want her in the rain and obviously he wanted her to know for even brief moments apart that he loved her more than words could express.

Tears filled my eyes and my heart overflowed.  What a beautiful way to live life!  Those two love birds were a living testament of what it means to cherish every moment with those you love.  I have no idea why they were at the clinic today.  I have no idea if one or both of them are severely ill or just in for ailments that come with growing old.  But what was clearly defined was a living example of a love that far surpasses what the world has tried to box in love to be.  It isn't about passion.  It isn't about youthfulness and beauty of the outward form.  It isn't something that dims as the years go by, but true love grows deeper, more tender, more beautiful from the inside out.  It was simply breath taking.  She was adored.  He was adored. I was touched.

Todd's Memolly and Pepolly are a lot like this.  They hold hands.  They stick by each other as they age and life gets difficult.  And they are just cute.  This couple today reminded me of them.  But I know Todd's grandparents.  I know how they are funny together and how they are devoted.  This couple was total strangers.  I know nothing about them other than the 10 minutes I observed them together.  And in those short minutes, I feel like I know their history is deep, long, and rich together.  It took only those brief, short moments for me to clearly recognize they were as one. 

I was reflecting on it all the way home.  And of course...it brought a nugget for the day from the life lessons of Eathan's journey.  My nugget for this day is never let a single moment of separation come that you haven't left your loved one with the remembrance of your love.  We sometimes assume the next moment will come.  This elderly couple lived in front of me today, the very thing Eathan lived in front of us his last day on earth.  There wasn't a moment to waste.  It was the time in the "right nows" to express that love.  That sweet man didn't wait until they were going to bed.  He didn't wait until they were parting for the day.  He took the moment at hand, where only moments would separate them as he went to the car to bring it around for his precious bride, to lean over and tenderly express his love so it could linger with her.  It was clear, he wanted no question left in her heart of his love. 

Eathan did the same thing the last day of his life.  He told me over and over and over, "Mama, I Lu you!"  I had no idea it was his last day.  I had no idea with every passing minute it was nearing his last on earth.  I just knew he loved me.  He made sure of it.  Just like that sweet man today.  Both of them knew time was drawing short and it was vital to leave their love to linger.  Every day I close my eyes at some point and cherish that last day and those words spoken over and over.  I have no doubt that sweet couple, when life separates them for a time until eternity, that love will linger as well.  It is a gift that endures all pain and sorrow. It is remarkably healing and enriching.  It is Christ.

It's an old cliche', but somehow tonight it is quite fitting after seeing that precious couple in action today.  "Live each day as if it is your last."  If we truly do that, how would our daily routine moments change? How would our expressions of emotions evolve and erupt?  And how would those around us be touched in the most tender of ways?  I want to be like that old man... to my husband, my kids, my family, my friends.  I don't want to live someones life for them, I just want to love them while they live theirs and I live mine and we all entwine.  I want to hug and laugh and cry and share.  I want to refrain when its time.  I want to speak when its time.  But mostly, I just want to love.

Here is your kiss on the forehead.... from me to you, in honor of that sweet old couple at Todd's doctor's office.

Robin